Thursday, October 24, 2013

Unwritten: CyberSecurity and Aspergers

Now public... I sent a copy to two people who asked for the background on the Take Down notice on my website. Both blocked me.

In short, don't ask me questions if you wouldn't want me to answer.

Two more names on my shit list. I should turn them against each other and probably will if I get bored. ;)

I know where you live!! Lol.

Sample of my writing WAS included. File corrupted in transfer.

Can't figure out that stupid app. Made this in docs to go. Have major network problems and my Amazon account is hacked.

Spent over 3 hours trying to straighten it out, changed password 6 times. Infuriating.

I lost over $70- in my account (I had credit and make money from website subscriptions.)

Both Gmail and Yahoo got hacked. And if you read my blog, you already know about the Amazon hack.

My site comes down on the 30th and American Internet is a fucking nightmare. I informed Columbia that they were hacked (I know head of Academic Computing and Security personally after 18 years) and they are encouraging me to write a book about hacking, social engineering, and I'm also thinking of approaching ex-AspieKid about writing a book about the division and online bullying and divide within the NT / Aspie Community.

Janis Sharp has graciously agreed to write forward (her book is being turned into a movie) and quite frankly, I need something to keep me from losing my mind and soul while I still have one.

AspieKid is a fucking genius. He is one of my absolute faves (author of Santa is an Aspie) and shares my interest in the law and social justice.

He recently took his site offline and closed all his social media accounts after finding himself bullied, disrespected and marginalized by the NT "experts" much like I was by members of the AntiSec, Anonymous, DefCon, and people within CyberSecurity industry who doxed my medical records and financials and posted in forums under names like "Jerry Y" and "Marc Durant" "Karen Durant" "Charlie Sheen ASD" "Joe Black" "SickJew" "JDenigma" "Green Squirrel" "Agent Daddy" to name but a few...

To find how much these individuals and groups have invested in socially engineering and creating hostile, volatile, and juvenile forums to chastise and destroy decent, caring, unique individuals like myself is truly a vile and despicable problem that continues to grow and escalate around the world spreading like a human virus online.

In my case, CyberSecurity professionals ranging from known terrorists (on the real life watch list) to hackers offering cash for "titty pics" on live webcasts.

Several created forums both private and public to discuss my financial and family problems, openly mocked my Aspergers and posted private medical and financial records online.

Some were authentic HIPAA protected documents (such as prescription records documenting that I had been prescribed Klonopin as evidence that I was receiving treatment for OCD, anxiety, and depression after serious car accident and VERY traumatic event) and posted my parent's home and work address on the internet to support their (somewhat true but disturbing lack of parental support while I underwent years of treatment for a severe neurological, spinal cord injury only to find myself in a taxi cab alone because my own mother refused to drive me or "waste money" to accompany me to breast surgery.

I was asked to sign a release to allow the surgeon to remove my breast without waking me up from a breast biopsy at 35 years old.

I refused. By that point I had already decided that I would not undergo chemo or any other treatment if the biopsy revealed a malignant tumor.

I had a fighting chance up until that point. Now, I dread the thought of living this way for another 40 or 50 years and I need to do something that makes me feel the way I did before that horrific April when it all fell apart over a fraudulent tax return and a $4.50 late fee that resulted in events too disturbing to discuss in a "quick email" that may never be seen by anyone other than me and the CISPA fuckwits or hackers who like to dump my personal "d0x" in pastebin to flaunt their effective tactics at "destroying real people with problems for Lulz."

The same assholes who did that had the nerve to sell ELyssaD T-shirts in along side "Free Gary" T-shirts at DefCon.

That's all for now. The embedded document below was supposed to be a quick sample of what I am capable of given half a chance to do what I do best: Make people FEEL!

Make people think. Make people see things they might otherwise ignore. Compel people to act. To feel. To empathize. To be accountable for their actions and answer to a higher god.

They call me אל. Many have called upon me to be the voice of reason and nearly everyone wants me by their side in the midst of a true crisis. People have fallen at my feet, kissed them and start spewing crazy Jesus stuff when I take the time to see people before race, religion, SES, or bullshit labels and roles they play in homeless shelters and residential treatment facilities.

Some have called me God, *some have called me a miserable cunt born without a soul or a conscience. Many have called me brilliant, and those know me best and from afar have listened and read every word I have written or videos I have posted because they believe what I (reluctantly) have come to believe myself.

I matter. I may not be the prophet people predicted I would become but my story matters.

Elohim Daniel Emet.

Many believe my father is satanic illuminati and my mother to be more or less exactly what she is.

If the prophesy is true, my role is to deliver truth the the gods so they can pass judgment on my Illuminati-ish parents who embody both the best and the worst of the human condition.

They made me who I am. A ruthless, entitled bitch of a human being who isn't going to die despite the number of people who feel I am a *financial burden on society because I have something you'll never have.

I'll let you know when I figure out what that is!! Because typing this mother fucking draft journal entry on my iPhone for two hours is starting to really hurt my fucking arms and thumbs.

I can only think of a few people who may be laughing their asses off as I sign off in my best crazy voice so I can get back to editing the real thing on some other device that actually works.

Laugh. I may be crazy, but at least I am honest and whacky and fun.

Now let the church bells ring.

I have some "real work" to do. See sample below.

I'm on a mission. To finish the book I started 18 years ago that my mother threw out to send a message. Message received, mother dearest.

I'm sorry you feel I ruined your life.

My role may just be to save it. To save you from yourself before it is too late.

I am working on forgiveness.

That's all she wrote folks. Over and OUT.

אלוהים אמת

Just me,

e 📧

@ELyssaD™

http://elyssadurant.com

http://powersthatbeat.com

^ed

Thanks, mommy dearest. It must be genetic.

Morning Manifesto d'Jour

From: E

Date: April 25, 2013, 10:05:37 AM EDT

Subject: Re: Jude & Jaded

Morning manifesto

April 26, 2013

CyberCrimes, Law, Aspergers, Ethics

DRAFT on me iPhone 10:05am

I do believe that if we can prove CyberBullying is a crime and that is the only reason I subject myself to the vile messages and images that make me physically ill and nightmares 5 years after it happened.

If child commits suicide, people get outraged. If aspie gets upset or develops new symptoms or is afraid to seek treatment than it is because we "misread signals" or "have higher rate of depression, anxiety and suicide?"

I call bullshit. It makes all the more reprehensible. It is criminal negligence if people do not report this kind of behavior. Especially when it is done by people who have a legal "duty to report"

Furthermore, if this causes damage to their ability to use public domain is both illegal under the Federal Communication laws, ADA and 18 USC 1027.

I lost everything.

The last 72 hours I regressed into a 22 year old who was willing to risk going blind in one eye than listen to all the morons who tried to bully me into a dangerous situation that is still volatile because it kept me from focusing on what needs to be done and my inability to stop pacing in circles until I wear myself out and fall asleep for few hours.

I realize and act like a total freak and can hear people whisper or make me feel uncomfortable stimming of repeating phrases to myself to calm prevent winding up in the hospital because I can't handle the noise or bc I don't have comfortable clothes to wear, but I had to go with my gut and realize that if I don't speak up and try to make people understand how much has been lost in that time, they. Win.

And after so many years, people see posts from five years ago and use it as justification to harass me now.

I walk a fine line every second of every day.

Yes, I would rather people see all of the wonderful articles I have written, but instead they see all of the fake d0x and embarrassing letters from my mother doing what Leah is doing to you.

I know this is long winded and hope you are following the logic, but, as a 40 year old woman with multiple degrees form the Ivy League and a pretty decent résumé my mother claimed me as a dependent on her taxes when I was living on my own for 16 years. She claimed adult dependent child and refused to amend so I could get my benefits reinstated.

Six months ago she nearly killed me in her 60,000 car and WATCHED as her new (6 foot plus militant new husband) stood over my bed and broke my only lifeline because he did not like my music or the sound of my voice.

My mother stood in corner and watched and after he leaves tells me, "I'll slap you in the fucking head if I lose my home because of you."

Then she leaves and I call two NTs in nearby and ask if I can crash for a few days at a hotel to stay safe.

"'MY SON HAS AUTISM. I CAN'T AFFORD TO blah blah blah"

In the next breath he posts my name on his website AurismAid.org so he could exploit my work and appear legitimate resource for ASD when they did nothing to help me find resources or job since that would keep me from the brilliant work I did for charity event that never even took place.

Then, I actually donated $25 to their pseudo charity (anonymous donation but I have receipt) only to find out they are exploiting others with ASD and have no 501c3, business license or accreditation to train people on anything other than how to be a shady, creepy parent who solicits donations on FaceBook for his son who is unable to speak or use toilet at 15 years old.

I was outraged. I could not believe they were taking advantage of this horrible situation to gain knout and more Leah's to keep tell me that I am the bully when I expose the scam and refuse to approve a PR stunt to gain what he *thinks" is creds and respect for being a hero dad on GMA.

Well, I don't think that makes a hero or a man if he needs to prey on the weak and the sails using MY words with Obama's face in a PSA.

I was good enough to;

do the work (for free)

Get them tons of web traffic to trend on google

Looked good on paper with letters after my name

had access to people with deep pockets and good PR

Gave them the appearance of "hiring" people with ASD so they could appeal to anti AutismSpeaks crowd

BUT, I wasn't deemed good enough to step in when Obama and Jenny McCarthy declined to make a statement to public about Autism ??

When i saw the statement that I made without permission, citation, or credit, I hit the fucking roof. I quit immediately.

Then I get flood of DMs offering everything money if I went along with the charade promising followers on twitter?

HELLO? Wake the fuck up. I don't give fuck if you have 10,000 or 200,000 followers who are willing to post bullshit and lies all over the web.

In fact, the idea that these people are SO pathetic that they need to exert their "influence" using these tactics is so much MORE pathetic, opportunistic, offensive and sad.

It is totally defeats the purpose because they use that influence to silence anyone who is either brave or stupid enough to stand refuse to comply.

This is Nazi science 101.

(Hope You are following thus far because my arms really hurt)

So, I start tweeting (thinking outlod) the way I do when I need to hear click of keyboard and heat my own voice say the words out loud as I pace until they come out sounding just right.

Gonna have to take break because I have been writing these words and concepts for years and will eventually put the pieces all together if I ever get a computer I can figure out how to use)

I waited, and waited and waited for years to see if anyone would ever see the pain and the logic of this ridiculous role I have taken on and uncover the message I am trying to put out there for future generations when they attempt to make sense out such a "virtual" reality that will either kill me or save me if I can get off this rock (or at times make it through the day without wishing I will find something to make this life worth living again.

Many people have told me that the world would be better off if I had nerve been born or I would just kill myself since they feel I am less than human and don't deserve to eat or have Internet or medical care since I am apparently THAT much of a financial burden on society.

Guess what. Yes, I want to die. Yes I am impulsive, compulsive, and self righteous BUT my logic is flawless given the right tools and opportunity to make my petty existence tolerable on the off chance that future generations or alien life forms will realize that I am different and "crazy" but one hell of a friend when the shit hits the fan.

I gotta go. I haven't slept more than 4-6 hours since my mother showed up and tried to take me to the ER so she could show off her parenting skills and have one more reason to gain sympathy and jeers from her friends or hit pay dirt and convince doctors or herself that I am causing her problems and try to stick me in a facility like Credemore so she can collect the insurance she took out on me the day before I moved in.

Better off dead? Maybe.

Willing to pull the trigger? Not on your fucking life. I would not give then the satisfaction.

And for every person who does not stand with me or will use this as more "proof" that I don't deserve to breathe or use the Internet to distract, numb, or inspire others by refusing to just disappear doesn't appreciate what I giving back to anyone who wants to know why I do what I do.

Over. And over. And over again. Until somebody listens. Or I find another way to entertain myself!!

Yes. I have video. And it ain't pretty after walking home from the hospital in 80 weather wearing black pants and the only sweater that fits.

Maybe I'll get online and order myself a pink Tank top off JadedExposure

You would think the bastard would give me one for free. But oh no. Can't have the real Elyssa on the air. It would ruin the show if they actually aired my response and statement when I answered the phone and dun. They did not even use block on caller ID.

Those bitches need to die.

That is the DailyDDoSe June 26, 2013

Just me,

@ELyssaD™

http://elyssadurant.com

http://powersthatbeat.com

^ed

On Apr 25, 2013, at 7:35 AM, AK wrote:

Yes, it should all be addressed legally. Leah, Heather, Ariane, Ib and others should have criminal records too. Leah should not be allowed to be a teacher running classrooms of kids. But the authorities will never get involved in blog wars and online bullying unless it turns to violent crime. I'd like to make some kind of Internet self-policing system, but I don't know how it would work. I've been so stressed from thinking about all of this that it is hard to concentrate on anything anymore. It is affecting my ability to survive, and they will never be brought to justice.

On 04/24/2013 11:24 PM, Elyssa wrote:

Just me,

@ELyssaD™

http://elyssadurant.com

http://powersthatbeat.com

^ed

Begin forwarded message:

From: [omjtted]

Date: April 25, 2013, 1:14:47 AM EDT

To: Elyssa

Subject: Re: Jude & Jaded

Dear ^ed,

Yeah, I've seen jaded's crap before. So sorry but this is a form of cyberbullying that should be addressed via legal channels. Ugh!

Ad hominem attacks are common amongst the idiot set. Hope all is well in your mental universe. These people are nowhere. ;) Be of good cheer?

Luv ya...

Your friends,

Vax & Krewe

PS: Sorry about the belated response. Haven't been to email for many a day.

On 4/22/13, Elyssa wrote:

JadedSecurity » Who is Elyssa Durant??

http://jadedsecurity.net/2011/06/20/who-is-elyssa-durant/

Just me,

@ELyssaD™

http://elyssadurant.com

http://powersthatbeat.com

^ed

“…a statute which either forbids or requires the doing of an act in

terms so vague that men of common intelligence must necessarily guess

at its meaning and differ as to its application violates the first

essential of due process of law.” United States Supreme Court,

Connally v. General Const. Co,. 269 U.S. 385 (1926)

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Cookson, Peter W. School Choice: The Struggle for the Soul of American Education. New Haven: Yale University Press, 1994. Save to EasyBib

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Mark, Melvin M. What Works and How Can We Tell?: A Seminar with Melvin M. Mark Professor of Psychology, Pennsylvania State University. [Melbourne]: Dept. of Natural Resources and Environment, 2002. Save to EasyBib

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Natriello, Gary, Aaron Pallas M., and Carolyn Riehl. Creating More Responsive Student Evaluation Systems for Disadvantaged Students. Baltimore, MD: Center for Research on Effective Schooling for Disadvantaged Students, 1991. Save to EasyBib

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Elyssa Durant, Ed.M.

Research & Policy Analyst

MLA Proposal 7.23.2013 3:09pm

UNWRITTEN: Runaway

Thanks for your reply and insight into the events leading up to the transfer of custody when I was just a kid.

I have been writing about these events so I can move on with my life and go back to what I love doing.

I had not heard a peep from Karen in years and now that she is a few miles away and causing considerable chaos I have been reliving the events to remind myself not to get too comfortable.

Karen withdrew me from my graduate school and told my Adviser I wasn't well enough to be in the program at Columbia.

Every time I get a new job or a new opportunity she shows up either at my home or my workplace to sabotage the opportunity.

She NEEDS Lauren and I to be sick so she doesn't have to face the reality that she is in large part responsible.

I believe she has Munchaussen by proxy and thrives on the attention and sympathy she gets when she tells people that she is a "poor grieving widow" and claimed me as a dependent in NY State until the IRS caught her in 2009.

She refused to file an amended return for $70 and after the CID investigated they ruled that she could NOT claim me as a dependent since I was living and working for the State of Tennessee in the Office of the Governor.

The case has recently been reopened (August 20) and they have already ruled that I was falsely claimed as an adult dependent child by my mother in NY state when I was living and working in Tennessee.

I am trying to protect myself from losing any more than I already have. In order to do that, I must protect myself from ever going through this again.

I need verification that Karen surrendered her parental rights:

Effective August 15, 1988, physical custody of ED shall be with her father, MD.

Effective August 15, 1988, all child support payments and obligations in the instant matter are fully terminated.

Thank you for clarifying the events surrounding August 15, 1988.

Hopefully, she will be forced to admit that *she* made the decision to kick me out and stop blaming us both for destroying her life and stop using it S a way to manipulate those around her.

Won't ever bring it up again unless I am forced to in the course of this investigation by the OIG, CID and IRS.

Thanks, Dad.

I'm sorry I hurt you. I am certainly more than ready to leave this in the past. I'm "over it" and have been for quite some time.

Love,

Liz

^ed

On Oct 21, 2013, at 12:24 PM, Marc Durant wrote:

You can't live in the past. You have to get over it and move on. You can't change the stripes on a tiger. You are not going to change anybody's personality.

Marc Durant

www.durantlaw.com

Sent from my iPad

On Oct 21, 2013, at 12:16 AM, "Elyssa D. Durant" wrote:

Hi Dad,

Thank you for your response. I do remember the events differently and it is quite possible that Karen contributed to me believing my Bat Mitzvah had been cancelled.

You are absolutely correct that she was always trying to manipulate situations and I remember clearly how she would get hysterical and even tried to bring police to your home. And I also remember the only time I ever saw you cry was the day she handed me over to your custody when she gave up custody when I was in the fifth grade.

I truly believed that my Bat Mitzvah had been cancelled and that I would have to call my friends and tell them it wasn't going to happen.

I can see you are angry and that was not my intention. It was a short excerpt from a VERY long chapter that was written in a dark, sarcastic tone and I did not mean to make light of the situation. I simply wanted to know what actually happened since Karen tells a completely different version of the story that is even further from the truth.

As for the "Running Away" part, Karen insists to this day that I went to live with you at 15 and tells everyone (including me) that I destroyed her ("again") by choosing to live with you and claims it was my choice and she had no part in the decision.

That is simply not true. She may have contacted you when I was fifteen but she didn't tell me anything about it.

She signed over custody on August 15, 1988 and I obtained a copy of that document several years ago from Philadelphia Court Clerk. She willingly signed over custody and surrendered her custodial obligations essentially terminating her parental rights or support obligations. I still have the document:

Durant v. Durant

Folio No. 0204182

DR No. 9-03257

Once I found out where my personal belongings were I think I called and I'm not sure exactly how I got to your house but I knew you were willing to provide a home for me no matter what happened when I was 12.

Karen begged me shortly afterwards to come back to NY and said she would come and get me and I could repeat my Junior year in my old school.

I told her no. I had no interest in repeating my Junior year or living with her knowing how unstable and unreliable she was. She had already thrown me out once. I wasn't about to put myself in her care willingly.

I do remember going to live with her after high school and working three jobs (Nutra System, Sands Point Gym and Miracle Mile) and being held against my will the night I took all of her pills after several hours locked in her bathroom.

Shortly before my 18th birthday she told me that she called you to discuss college and you refused to help with my college tuition since I wasn't smart enough to get into an Ivy League School.

I am pretty sure you paid for my first year at SUNY and I know for sure you paid for Penn State (except that one time you forgot because you had a client on death row and they dropped my classes. I asked you what he did, and you told me, "he killed a family" and I said, "don't you think maybe he deserves to die" and you told me, "my job is to give him the best defense possible" and I understood that.

I truly believed my Bat Mitzvah had been cancelled and my mother offered to throw me a party and drove me back to Yardley to "make up for the Bat Mitzvah you had planned."

To be continued.

I want to know the truth and accept the possibility that several other factors may have contributed to my memory of how it happened.

I tend to agree with the majority of what you have said here. And I am VERY glad you responded and I apologize for the pain I caused you.

I spent the last 28 years believing one thing and it wasn't until Grandma told me differently that my Bat Mitzvah was cancelled as a punishment. And Karen rushed in to throw a party at Newtown Racquetball Club to be the hero to rescue me from the embarrassment.

I'm sorry if my tone was too sarcastic. My greater concern is that Karen lied to me and continues to lie about so many things and blames me for most of them.

I will include this correspondence when I do publish since I feel it is representative of the lies I was made to believe over the years that have haunted me day and night since I was a small child.

I want to know the truth. Thank you for telling me your side.

And at least maybe Karen will be forced to stop telling the world that I "ran away" when I was fifteen.

She threw me away. A long, long time ago.

Thanks, Dad.

Sorry if this is painful for you. I had no idea you had such strong feelings about the events I discussed below.

I hope you realize that I was making a joke about the guess jeans (although she did actually promise me two pairs of guess jeans) like that could make up for the instability, insecurity and histrionics that I lived with while in her "care"

^ed

On Oct 20, 2013, at 6:48 PM, Marc Durant wrote:

You can publish whatever you want. You don't need my permission or approval.

You have your facts all wrong about the Bat Mitsvah. The invitations were never sent out. Right before they were going to be sent out, you left with your mother and said you weren't returning. That is why the B.M. didn't proceed; you and your mother threw everything into uncontrollable chaos. I did not "cancel" it before you left. Everything was set and it is not in my nature not to do something that I said I would do. As you say I am "a man of my word." For whatever reasons, your mother didn't want it to proceed; probably because she wasn't going to be the center of attention. She was going to be on the bimah with you and participate fully in the ceremony. She also was going to be invited to the party. Apparently that wasn't enough for her. She could have waited for six weeks, let you have the Bat Mitsvah with your friends as planned (at a gorgeous place in Peddler's Village) and then bribed you to live with her. Instead, she did it right before the B.M. knowing it would derail everything. People intend the natural and probable consequences of their acts.

Two years later she called me and said that she couldn't handle you because you were too difficult. She wanted to send you to live in Yardley. As so very unhappy as I was about the B.M.. i.e., the way it was selfishly sabotaged and the fact that she was invited to everything I planned, but I was not invited to even the ceremony she arranged on Long Island, I agreed. I thought that she as an adult was more responsible and blameworthy than a 13 year old. I also thought that you were better off in Yardley, which I regarded as a more stable environment, than with her. Hence, I agreed.

As to your running away because I was too strict, there was a pattern there too. If you were grounded or whatever because of teenage misbehavior, you would complain to your mother. She was always delighted to play the heroine and save you by helping you escape. She was always delighted to help you evade the natural and probable consequences of your behavior. Do you have to be a Ph.D. to comprehend that it is unwise for the noncustodial parent of a teenager to undermine the discipline imposed by the custodial parent?

There was another witness to the Bat Mitsvah events, Rita. I won't tell her about this email exchange. You can ask her about what happened.

Marc Durant

Durant & Durant LLP

325 Chestnut Street

Suite 1116

Philadelphia, PA 19106-2611

215.592.1818

www.durantlaw.com

______________________________

From: Elyssa D. Durant

Sent: Sunday, October 20, 2013 5:16 PM

To: Marc Durant

Cc: Elyssa Danielle Durant

Subject: Excerpt from my new book: Unwritten: Runaway (Draft)

I spoke to Grandma for several hours and I it made me realize we may have had some misunderstandings and unfinished business.

This is how I remember it (excerpt from Unwritten: Chapter 7). Are you okay if I publish this?

Karen still insists I ran away at 15 and blames me for destroying her marriages and her life.

And claims you kidnapped Lauren and I ruined her life when I wanted to go too.

I told her I was five years old and to get the fuck over it. Here is what I remember. I'm hoping you have a little time to read through it before I submit it for publication. Just a few paragraphs until I clean up the rest of the Chapter.

Hope it doesn't upset you when I posted that open letter to my dad. Several fathers around the world contacted me to tell me that it inspired them to reach out to their own fathers, daughters, and children.

I may post this on my private site and hope Karen doesn't come across it on the off chance she ever visits any of my websites.

She refuses to read my work anyway. She says it "hurts her head."

Look forward to hearing back from you.

Love,

Liz

EXCERPT:

I told the ER physician not to bother calling my parents. My dad and I were estranged and a waste their time to call my mother who had kicked me out at 15 without telling me first.

I was in the 10th Grade and came home from my full time job (which sadly paid more than my Graduate student stipend at Vanderbilt University from 96-99 or any other job I have had in the last 20 years. Except for the five days I danced in my underwear so I could buy a car when I missed my flight back to school my Junior Year. True Story. Five days? Five grand. New car.)

Anyhoo, came home from work as a (fully clothed) waitress on a Barge at a Marina on the North Shore of Long Island.

I worked since I was 13 and got fired from a fancy seafood restaurant for lying about my age.

As soon as I turned fourteen I got my working papers and found a great job a few miles from home.

I was coming home after the dinner shift and my keys didn't work when I put them in the front door of our home on Sands Point Road.

I figured maybe someone lost their keys and called a locksmith to change the locks while was at work.

It was after midnight so I just figured I would climb in window like I had done so many times before.

But the window was locked. When I looked in the window, all my shit was gone. Even the furniture was rearranged in my bedroom.

I had no idea what my mother did with my things until a friend found out a few weeks later that she sent all my crap to my father's home in Philadelphia.

Okay, then. Hadn't seen my dad him since she picked me up from there just before my 13th birthday and drove me to Vermont with her 2nd ex husband and had me call my dad from a pay phone to tell him I wasn't coming back.

She bribed me with two pairs of Guess Jeans and that was all it took for a Cheerleader who wanted a New York wardrobe and had worn already worn everything in her closet once.

My dad obviously wasn't thrilled.

But I was young and he was strict.

As the youngest in my class, I spent the last year and a half attending all my friends Bar and Bat Mitzvahs.

I was disappointed that I could have LaMasquerade and a Black Tie affair at the Warwick like my best friend and I was also disappointed that I wouldn't be going to Lawrenceville, Princeton Day School or Hunn with the rest of my friends for High School but most of all, I was terribly embarrassed that my father cancelled my upcoming Bat Mitzvah after the invitations went out.

He was strict. He didn't care about losing the money he spent on the Venue, the invitations, the elegant pink roses we picked out or the years I spent going to Hebrew School three times a week. I was grounded and I was devastated.

To this day, I'm not sure exactly what I did to warrant such a severe punishment. But in the 6th grade he grounded me for a year and he meant it. He is a man of his word so when he said, "No Bat Mitzvah" all I could do was run away so I didn't have to face my friends and explain that my Bat Mitzvah was cancelled because I was being punished for doing something that made my dad furious.

So two pairs of Guess Jeans and a new school sounded pretty good to a spoiled twelve year old.

I packed a duffle bag and put it outside on the wet autumn lawn and when my mom came "to visit" from New York, she or one of her ex husbands carried the duffle bag to the car and we drove straight to a fancy Bed and Breakfast since Long Island was taking a beating by Hurricane Gloria. The only hurricane other than Sandy to hit New York in my lifetime.

BREAK:: just got a text from my mother. 6:48 am. She is on her way over.

I will continue with this chapter and tell you how GAF assessments and false diagnoses run the health insurance market place another day.

Holy crap on a cracker. I had a point to this story.

I have to text her back or I will lose this entire chapter of my book when she calls.

To be addressed:

Duplication of Benefits

Billing and Diagnostic Codes

The system is designed to keep you sick and poor.

...and the rest is still unwritten.

^ed

Who Is Elyssa Durant?

I started this private site after my name, ID, medical and financial info was stolen, made public in Pastebin, and sold on T-shirts at the DefCon hackers conference.

I never got one penny for the T-shirts and apparel sold and was never reimbursed for the damage done to my computer equipment and mobile devices as a result of HARD CORE hackers.

I was promised the T-shirts and promo ads would be pulled from the event and the black hat hackers known as Lulz, AntiSec, (Sabu and Co.) would take them down and refrain from using my likeness for promotional purposes.

They were not.

They used my name, my likeness, my photos, my social security number, my ID, my address and more to create a slew of fake social media accounts to post insane bullshit across a variety of platforms.

They even socially engineered my closest friends and family members in various forums to reinforce the charade.

They claimed the T-shirts were for charity and that $1.00 would be donated for every ELyssaD garment sold.

Not only did I not receive any such monies, I am quite certain these fuckwits have no idea how serious it is to impersonate a 501(c)3.

So not only did they make a profit from exploiting every aspect of my life, they harassed my friends, impersonated an ex-cop who has been one of most trusted allies and confidant; threatened friends who dare to speak up on my behalf by calling them on the phone and identifying themselves as law enforcement. ANOTHER felony.

They made a profit. They offered a reward for tittie pics, had podcasts, comic books and sold a line of women's apparel to promote their podcasts, show and of course, make money.

They created multiple fake identities on various social media platforms. They pwned my website, social media accounts, linked in, private forums, etc... harassed my friends and posted my fathers home address on the Internet.

They altered personal documents they stole from my private files, altered them, and had the nerve to put the FAKE documents back in to my web albums and made them public.

ONE LOGIN = ONE FELONY

Destruction of evidence (especially records that pertain to employee benefits is a whole other class of crimes)

These individuals are clearly guilty, and have no problem advertising their skills across the hacker community.

They destroyed my professional credibility with disinformation writing posting ridiculous website entries that present my professional certifications as a practicing therapist to make them appear as if I was the patient not the provider.

65 "people" impersonating me on social media platforms?

My friends, sister, brothers, my mother, and even "Agent Daddy" became targets as well.

I started this site hoping for a do-over. My name is ELyssa. ELyssaD™ and, for he record I've never done midget porn!

Differentiating Aspergers from ADHD

Differentiating between Aspergers and ADHD

by admin, aspergershq.com

February 4th 2012

The familiar territory shared by Aspergers and ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) is one of the most commonexamples that highlights the fact that the world of psychiatry would be far less complicated if all the psychiatric classifications fell perfectly under one distinct category, without much overlap. In cases such as that of Aspergers and ADHD, it is quite common for a patient to be diagnosed with one disaease, only later to be told that they actually suffer from the other. Not only can this be perplexing but it can have a huge impact on the treatment of the disease, as the less certain one is about which disorder one suffers from, the less likely will one be able to take the right approach to deal with it effectively.

Hence if you are confused between Aspergers and ADHD, the following paragraphs will be quite helpful, as they will highlight the differences and similarities of Aspergers and ADHD.

Aspergers and ADHD – Similarities

Aspergers and ADHD

When it comes to the symptoms of Aspergers and ADHD, it is actually extremely similar. As a mater of fact a study carried out has shown that amongst 30 plus children who had aspergers syndrome, more than 90% of them were incorrectly diagnsoed with ADHD being the common misdiagnosis. Hence a misdiagnosis of Aspergers and ADHD is made frequently.

The similarities of Aspergers and ADHD are as follows:

Both have problems in building social relationships and communicating properly. Failure to understand social norms, lacking eye contact, interrupting others etc are common symptoms of both Aspergers and ADHD.
Being easily disturbed and often suffering from anxiety and depression is also common to both the disorders.
Extreme behaviors such as hyperactivity and lethargic behaviors are frequently seen in both Aspergers and ADHD.
Lacking motor skills and struggling with co-ordination is frequent in both disorders.
Patients diagnosed with both Aspergers and ADHD are often found to have high intelligenmce scores.
Both are difficult to diagnose when at a young age, and both are said to occur 4 times more often in malesthan in women.

Aspergers and ADHD – Differences

There is little doubt that there are a number of similarities between Aspergers and ADHD; however there are quite a few distinctionsalso, which particularly become much more apparent as the patient advances in age.

A person with ADHD is frequently cannot do any activity quietly, and hence often indulge in disruptive behaviors by often interrupting others. However those with aspergers find it difficult to make themselves understood verbally.
Another difference is that those with ADHD usually make mistakes as they are unable to pay attention to detail, but those with Aspergers are in fact excessively focused on one particular activity, that they forget about everything else around them.
Also, those with ADHD cannot stop troublesomebehavior, even though they recognize it as being unacceptable. On the other hand, those with aspergers are usually seen to indulge in repetitive behavior.

It has been scientifically proven that the major reason for the similarities between Aspergers and ADHD is that the same area of the brain is affected. However at the same time the root causes of both, Aspergers and ADHD, certainly vary and hence are treated differently.

Unwritten: Unfinished.

From: "Elyssa D. Durant"
Date: October 21, 2013, 11:51
Subject: Unwritten: Unfinished.

"It seems painfully obvious to me now that the only way out was through...

If had known then what I know now, I would not have wasted so much precious tiine searching for the source of my profound sadness.

I can no longer allow myself to be drawn into this circle madness.

I have spent far too long asking myself, how did I get here?

I think it is time to reframe the question. Rather than ask myself how I got here, I need to ask myself, how do I get out?

Elyssa D. Durant, Ed.M. © 2009

^ed

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Treatment of PTSD

National Center for PTSD

ptsd.va.gov | Oct 5th 2010

Treatment of PTSD (PDF)

Today, there are good treatments available for PTSD. When you have PTSD, dealing with the past can be hard. Instead of telling others how you feel, you may keep your feelings bottled up. But talking with a therapist can help you get better.

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is one type of counseling. It appears to be the most effective type of counseling for PTSD. The VA is providing two forms of cognitive behavioral therapy to Veterans with PTSD: Cognitive Processing Therapy (CPT) and Prolonged Exposure (PE) therapy. To learn more about these types of therapy, see our fact sheets listed on the Treatment page.

There is also a similar kind of therapy called eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) that is used for PTSD. Medications have also been shown to be effective. A type of drug known as a selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI), which is also used for depression, is effective for PTSD.

Types of cognitive behavioral therapy

What is cognitive therapy?

In cognitive therapy, your therapist helps you understand and change how you think about your trauma and its aftermath. Your goal is to understand how certain thoughts about your trauma cause you stress and make your symptoms worse.

You will learn to identify thoughts about the world and yourself that are making you feel afraid or upset. With the help of your therapist, you will learn to replace these thoughts with more accurate and less distressing thoughts. You will also learn ways to cope with feelings such as anger, guilt, and fear.

After a traumatic event, you might blame yourself for things you couldn't have changed. For example, a soldier may feel guilty about decisions he or she had to make during war. Cognitive therapy, a type of CBT, helps you understand that the traumatic event you lived through was not your fault.

What is exposure therapy?

In exposure therapy your goal is to have less fear about your memories. It is based on the idea that people learn to fear thoughts, feelings, and situations that remind them of a past traumatic event.

By talking about your trauma repeatedly with a therapist, you'll learn to get control of your thoughts and feelings about the trauma. You'll learn that you do not have to be afraid of your memories. This may be hard at first. It might seem strange to think about stressful things on purpose. But you'll feel less overwhelmed over time.

With the help of your therapist, you can change how you react to the stressful memories. Talking in a place where you feel secure makes this easier.

You may focus on memories that are less upsetting before talking about worse ones. This is called "desensitization," and it allows you to deal with bad memories a little bit at a time. Your therapist also may ask you to remember a lot of bad memories at once. This is called "flooding," and it helps you learn not to feel overwhelmed.

You also may practice different ways to relax when you're having a stressful memory. Breathing exercises are sometimes used for this.

What is EMDR?

Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) is another type of therapy for PTSD. Like other kinds of counseling, it can help change how you react to memories of your trauma.

While thinking of or talking about your memories, you'll focus on other stimuli like eye movements, hand taps, and sounds. For example, your therapist will move his or her hand near your face, and you'll follow this movement with your eyes.

Experts are still learning how EMDR works. Studies have shown that it may help you have fewer PTSD symptoms. But research also suggests that the eye movements are not a necessary part of the treatment.

Medication

Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) are a type of antidepressant medicine. These can help you feel less sad and worried. They appear to be helpful, and for some people they are very effective. SSRIs include citalopram (Celexa), fluoxetine (such as Prozac), paroxetine (Paxil), and sertraline (Zoloft).

Chemicals in your brain affect the way you feel. For example, when you have depression you may not have enough of a chemical called serotonin. SSRIs raise the level of serotonin in your brain.

There are other medications that have been used with some success. Talk to your doctor about which medications are right for you.

Other types of treatment

Some other kinds of counseling may be helpful in your recovery. However, more evidence is needed to support these types of treatment for PTSD.

Group therapy

Many people want to talk about their trauma with others who have had similar experiences.

In group therapy, you talk with a group of people who also have been through a trauma and who have PTSD. Sharing your story with others may help you feel more comfortable talking about your trauma. This can help you cope with your symptoms, memories, and other parts of your life.

Group therapy helps you build relationships with others who understand what you've been through. You learn to deal with emotions such as shame, guilt, anger, rage, and fear. Sharing with the group also can help you build self-confidence and trust. You'll learn to focus on your present life, rather than feeling overwhelmed by the past.

Brief psychodynamic psychotherapy

In this type of therapy, you learn ways of dealing with emotional conflicts caused by your trauma. This therapy helps you understand how your past affects the way you feel now.

Your therapist can help you:

Identify what triggers your stressful memories and other symptoms.
Find ways to cope with intense feelings about the past.
Become more aware of your thoughts and feelings, so you can change your reactions to them.
Raise your self-esteem.

Family therapy

PTSD can affect your whole family. Your kids or your partner may not understand why you get angry sometimes, or why you're under so much stress. They may feel scared, guilty, or even angry about your condition.

Family therapy is a type of counseling that involves your whole family. A therapist helps you and your family to communicate, maintain good relationships, and cope with tough emotions. Your family can learn more about PTSD and how it is treated.

In family therapy, each person can express his or her fears and concerns. It's important to be honest about your feelings and to listen to others. You can talk about your PTSD symptoms and what triggers them. You also can discuss the important parts of your treatment and recovery. By doing this, your family will be better prepared to help you.

You may consider having individual therapy for your PTSD symptoms and family therapy to help you with your relationships.

How long does treatment last?

CBT treatment for PTSD often lasts for 3 to 6 months. Other types of treatment for PTSD can last longer. If you have other mental health problems as well as PTSD, treatment may last for 1 to 2 years or longer.

What if someone has PTSD and another disorder? Is the treatment different?

It is very common to have PTSD at that same time as another mental health problem. Depression, alcohol or drug abuse problems, panic disorder, and other anxiety disorders often occur along with PTSD. In many cases, the PTSD treatments described above will also help with the other disorders. The best treatment results occur when both PTSD and the other problems are treated together rather than one after the other.

What will we work on in therapy?

When you begin therapy, you and your therapist should decide together what goals you hope to reach in therapy. Not every person with PTSD will have the same treatment goals. For instance, not all people with PTSD are focused on reducing their symptoms.

Some people want to learn the best way to live with their symptoms and how to cope with other problems associated with PTSD. Perhaps you want to feel less guilt and sadness. Perhaps you would like to work on improving your relationships at work, or communicating with your friends and family.

Your therapist should help you decide which of these goals seems most important to you, and he or she should discuss with you which goals might take a long time to achieve.

What can I expect from my therapist?

Your therapist should give you a good explanation for the therapy. You should understand why your therapist is choosing a specific treatment for you, how long they expect the therapy to last, and how they will tell if it is working.

The two of you should agree at the beginning that this plan makes sense for you. You should also agree on what you will do if it does not seem to be working. If you have any questions about the treatment, your therapist should be able to answer them.

You should feel comfortable with your therapist and feel you are working as a team to tackle your problems. It can be difficult to talk about painful situations in your life, or about traumatic experiences that you have had. Feelings that emerge during therapy can be scary and challenging. Talking with your therapist about the process of therapy, and about your hopes and fears in regards to therapy, will help make therapy successful.

If you do not like your therapist or feel that the therapist is not helping you, it might be helpful to talk with another professional. In most cases, you should tell your therapist that you are seeking a second opinion.

Original Page: http://www.ptsd.va.gov/public/pages/treatment-ptsd.asp

Shared from Read It Later

Elyssa Durant, Ed.M.

United States of America

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