That's the "problem"
Both PTSD and their respective diagnoses (Borderline, Histrionic, Narcissist and lack of insight ~ clinically) means that I'm "triggered" emotionally AND physically with muscle guarding and vascular reactions that cause pain and numbness.
I did biofeedback when I was at Columbia so I'm AWARE of what's going on but I'm not able to control the physiological response and Karen calling me and my doctors and nurses despite a HIPPA block and a security alert (Good Sam and Psych) doesn't keep her from calling and weaseling her way into my life and since she's so "charming" and tells people she's a social worker, they gave her information, my room number AND my penguin necklace (my favorite thing in the world) and she stole money, FOOD, jewelry and gifts people sent me from and returned them to Amazon and Bed Bath and Beyond and didn't give me the credit and they were special gifts. She disconnected my cell phone several times; withdrew me from school TWICE (when I was 15 and she claims I "ran away" when she mailed you my stuff; changed the locks; quit my job and withdrew me from school without telling me; and twice from Columbia and tried at Vanderbilt)
She stole gifts from Grandma and Earrings; and Aurora penguin my friend who died from COVID sent from Scotland; Texas; and Kentucky) and it's so far beyond the scope of normal I can't tell you how disturbing it is.
I know intellectually that this is beyond fucked up but my body doesn't know and I'm now having terrible symptoms ~ dizziness and profuse sweating just writing this) and Radiology and Neurosurgery is here; so I'm going to leave it at that.
They i'm going to address the thyroid issue that has come up the glucose the Doppler and electrocardio gram they want to do for my legs and feet however I need to go because I'm having an acute stress response I need to be clearheaded and calm for the evaluations.
I realize of course you don't need to hear this George does anybody else who comes into my room or the doctors and this prevents me from developing healthy relationships and receiving proper treatment for my physical and psychological issues.
Certainly I need therapy and I need to do mindfulness training again possibly biofeedback but certainly treatment for my PTSD.
Writing it down or verbalizing it helps me and has been recommended by my previous therapist and the one who treated me when I was 29 and had my first nervous break down.
you have the ability to control your consciousness and tune her out. I do not and she calls and texts incessantly with total disregard for my boundaries and shows up uninvited.
Just quickly to give you a brief Concrete example of her behavior since I've been in the hospital she went to my apartment throughout my couch my bookcase and my desk I've only been here for three days Concrete example of her behavior since I've been in the hospital she went to my apartment throughout my couch my bookcase and my desk I've only been here for three days.
That's all for now I'm sorry to throw this at you but these are very important thanks if it requires a restraining order I'm prepared to do that but she has no business disposing of my personal items including sign books from my former academic mentors or my friend Ned Vizzini Who committed suicide but dedicated his NY Times best seller, "It's kinda a funny story" Me and gave me an autographed copy. Karen threw it out. That cannot be replaced.
For Lauren and then her OCD I have no idea what's wrong with her all I know is she's inappropriate and shows really disturbing signs a sibling rivalry I'm too old for that shit.
This is for both my journal and for when I get into therapy. As you know I wrote a book about Karen and her abuse and exploitation of my physical and emotional condition so that she could get sympathy and adoration from her friends dog sitter and the public at large.
Have to go now the medical professionals are waiting for me and I'm still in both spasm and sweating profusely.
Love you and Rita.
Doing the very best I can.
Love,
Liz 📧😘🐧
On Sat, Sep 19, 2020 at 8:18 AM Dad> wrote:
Just Put them out of mind. Nothing good will come from focusing on them.
> On Sep 19, 2020, at 7:55 AM, Liz wrote:
>
>
> The psychotic mother person had the nerve to send me photos of her Rosh Hashanah (Jewish New Year) party; didn't wish me a L'Shanah Tovah and then said she was too tired from entertaining to speak to me about the STAT medical testing and referral ordered at 8:47pm last night.
>
> Lauren was equally inappropriate and has been "competing" with me and told me she was paralyzed and incontinent from Lyme Disease and it's bizarre, offensive, dismissive and infuriating.
>
> But that's why I need a trauma specialist and ganglion block injections. I have a visceral response to their inappropriate behavior and the stress and PTSD triggers muscle spasms which in turn causes muscle guarding and tension affecting my neuro symptoms which both painful and counterproductive for my recovery.
Elyssa Durant Research and Policy Analyst
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